Something New
I decided I wanted to get back into writing. Then dragged my feet for a month. Finally, after a small win on my employment adventure, I decided to crack open blogspot and put something down in writing. Oddly enough, when I opened up Blogger, there sat two old blogs of mine; one a personal blog with no posts and the second a journal I had to keep as a part of my research project in high school. Reading about how passionate I was to legalize marijuana and show other people that it's a nearly harmless drug was sweet. I digress. I say it's odd because I didn't even remember these blogs - but Google did. Google always remembers.
I decided to do this in a blog format, because I need to start writing something longer than a Facebook status or Tweet. I'm forgetting how to tell a story from beginning to end, and it shows when I sit down to write cover letters. I may not be very good right now, but hopefully just the practice of writing something every day will be enough to get my creative juices flowing. Plus, I want to start doing freelance writing and it's best to have a few samples laying around. Again, I digress. Facebook would be a perfectly fine place to start writing short pieces, but honestly no one wants to see that on their timeline. Facebook is for memes, doggos and cattos, and keeping up on how many people you graduated high school with now have multiple degrees. So I wanted to make it a bit harder for people to track down my ramblings. You'll have to click an external link. Ha!
Into the good shit. You may have noticed I've made mention of applying for jobs, writing cover letters, selling my soul to online copy mills, etc. Sixteen days ago I was fired. Nine days ago I turned 25. I'm unemployed, a quarter of a century old, and still one third of the way to a two year degree. Suffice to say, I feel like I'm a bit of a mess right now. But - and literally this is the only thing keeping me going - I know for a fact I have the strength to make it through this. Like, the hard part hasn't even begun. I'm freaking out on behalf of future Hannah, but that's not very helpful. I wasn't fired for negligence, I wasn't fired for going off on my overbearing coworker, I wasn't let go because I lost client documents. I prefer not to go into why I was fired in particular, at least not publicly, but I definitely wasn't fired cause I wasn't good at what I did. And now I'll take those skills to a new industry and thrive.
To me, being fired was like being pushed out of the nest. I was comfortable and complacent and willing to put up with unacceptable behaviors for just a few more months, until I felt more secure to leave. But as it turns out, I can fly, and my boss probably did me a favor by letting me go. I've had tunnel vision on working in the legal industry for too long. I love law, and I love studying law, but it is not an environment well-suited to my personality, and I honestly couldn't have known that without first working in that environment.
I'm excited for my future, for the first time in a couple of years. I'm applying to temp agencies, hoping my extensive administrative skills will get me a job in a matter of weeks. I think temp work is the exact speed I need right now - something consistent for a short period of time, a W2 from the agency, flexibility to make doctor's appointments and load up on coursework in the fall. I've decided to switch my major from Legal Studies to Cyber Security, and I'm excited. Cyber security isn't The Dream, by any stretch of the imagination, but it would be a fun, smart job that genuinely helps people, pays pretty well, and might afford me the flexibility (or at least the cash) to go back to school for a degree in biology. Law is a smart world - but it's really heavy on the politics. People don't care how smart you are if they don't like you. In science, that might be a little less true. And at the very least, I'll be able to use my goddamn brain again every day. Figuring out how to fix a filing has nothing on figuring out how to protect corporations from malware or figuring out how to make a new strain of cannabis.
The world is my oyster. I just have to stop being a pussy, and fucking take that pearl.
I decided to do this in a blog format, because I need to start writing something longer than a Facebook status or Tweet. I'm forgetting how to tell a story from beginning to end, and it shows when I sit down to write cover letters. I may not be very good right now, but hopefully just the practice of writing something every day will be enough to get my creative juices flowing. Plus, I want to start doing freelance writing and it's best to have a few samples laying around. Again, I digress. Facebook would be a perfectly fine place to start writing short pieces, but honestly no one wants to see that on their timeline. Facebook is for memes, doggos and cattos, and keeping up on how many people you graduated high school with now have multiple degrees. So I wanted to make it a bit harder for people to track down my ramblings. You'll have to click an external link. Ha!
Into the good shit. You may have noticed I've made mention of applying for jobs, writing cover letters, selling my soul to online copy mills, etc. Sixteen days ago I was fired. Nine days ago I turned 25. I'm unemployed, a quarter of a century old, and still one third of the way to a two year degree. Suffice to say, I feel like I'm a bit of a mess right now. But - and literally this is the only thing keeping me going - I know for a fact I have the strength to make it through this. Like, the hard part hasn't even begun. I'm freaking out on behalf of future Hannah, but that's not very helpful. I wasn't fired for negligence, I wasn't fired for going off on my overbearing coworker, I wasn't let go because I lost client documents. I prefer not to go into why I was fired in particular, at least not publicly, but I definitely wasn't fired cause I wasn't good at what I did. And now I'll take those skills to a new industry and thrive.
To me, being fired was like being pushed out of the nest. I was comfortable and complacent and willing to put up with unacceptable behaviors for just a few more months, until I felt more secure to leave. But as it turns out, I can fly, and my boss probably did me a favor by letting me go. I've had tunnel vision on working in the legal industry for too long. I love law, and I love studying law, but it is not an environment well-suited to my personality, and I honestly couldn't have known that without first working in that environment.
I'm excited for my future, for the first time in a couple of years. I'm applying to temp agencies, hoping my extensive administrative skills will get me a job in a matter of weeks. I think temp work is the exact speed I need right now - something consistent for a short period of time, a W2 from the agency, flexibility to make doctor's appointments and load up on coursework in the fall. I've decided to switch my major from Legal Studies to Cyber Security, and I'm excited. Cyber security isn't The Dream, by any stretch of the imagination, but it would be a fun, smart job that genuinely helps people, pays pretty well, and might afford me the flexibility (or at least the cash) to go back to school for a degree in biology. Law is a smart world - but it's really heavy on the politics. People don't care how smart you are if they don't like you. In science, that might be a little less true. And at the very least, I'll be able to use my goddamn brain again every day. Figuring out how to fix a filing has nothing on figuring out how to protect corporations from malware or figuring out how to make a new strain of cannabis.
The world is my oyster. I just have to stop being a pussy, and fucking take that pearl.
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